Tucker Tuesday: When I Am Old


(with apologies to Jenny Joseph)


When I am an old dog I shall expect to be served
While wearing a tie-dyed bandanna covered with DAP,
And I shall spend my entire day under a soft blanket
Covered with bones, and get pills in Black Forest ham.
I shall pee on the patio when I am tired,
And steal food from Trixie’s bowl despite her growls,
And yammer at the couch when I think it’s bedtime,
No matter what is on television right now.
I shall refuse to go potty in the rain
And drink lots and lots and lots (and lots) of water,
Then hack and cough.
You can beg for food but refuse to take it,
Or eat three pounds of sausages at a go,
Or only Stella & Chewy’s for a week,
And hoard stuffies and pillows and blankets and swipe Xanax.
But now I must wear a cone so I do not lick,
And get fluids and supplements and potions,
And set a bad example for young Dennis.
I must demand that Dada give me his dinner.
But really I have been practicing all along.
And people who know me are not too shocked and surprised,
That suddenly I am old, and expect to be served.


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Posted on November 26, 2013, in Dogs, Vizslas and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 27 Comments.

  1. I would give you my diner too, Tucker. And if you want I can steal my dad’s dinner … but today he had tons of mustard on his plate…. beter tomorrow :o)

  2. Tucker, dude, you have earned it. Whatever you want. Dennis will just have to dog up and respect your age. Sending lots of hugs because I know things aren’t easy for you right now.


  3. Tucker, when TaiChi was still around and getting whatever she wanted, I’d always tell Fi, “When 500 years old you become, all the treats you want, you will get.” (Yeah, I’m a wee bit nerdy that way.) So dude, you get whatever you want, when you want – those privileges are earned when the muzzle turns gray, so tell Dennis to suck it up. :-)

    -Dr. Liz, who doesn’t usually speak like Yoda, but it happens.

  4. OK Tucker, do whatever feels right to you. It will be Dennis’s turn soon enough, or maybe even Trixie’s although I am not sure I can see that giving soul as a demander. Keep your tired bones covered up, eat what you like and enjoy the time that is left.


  5. And…you are entitled to every last line. :-)

  6. I agree…you should be beyond spoiled :) at any age :)

  7. Tucker – You milk it for all it is worth. You have earned it.

  8. Tucker- when we get old we should wear orange. O wait, we were born orange. Sleep tight, my friend, and enjoy the treats. the spirit of Maggie the Vizsla.

  9. PS- you look so much like me you gave my mom the drippy willies. Maggie

  10. Just keep doing what makes you happy and makes people smile. Happy Turkey Day to you all!

  11. Take advice from The Digital Underground Possee & Doowutchyalike! You’ve earned it.

  12. Awww, Tucker, you’ve earned whatever your heart desires!

  13. It’s all about you big guy!! You just do what ever makes you happy, cause you deserve it!! We let Bilbo do just about anything he wants nowadays too!!

  14. Awww Tucker. Your Dada made me cry. You have earned the love and care that you are being given in your old age. You have the best pawrents ever.

  15. Tucker, you just keep Mama and Dada waiting on you and letting you have your way. There has to be some reward for growing old.

  16. Dada sure knows how to get my tear ducts open, wish I were there to give you a kiss, Tucker. Accept all the treats you’re offered, if that’s not enough – beg!! Mimmier xoxox

  17. You deserve every privilege you are owed. We love you, Tucker

  18. The bandanna totally hides your age ;)
    Hope you & your humans are doing well…sounds like like is good!

  19. You go, Tucker! You deserve to get whatever your heart desires!

    Love ya lots♥
    Mitch and Molly

  20. Oh Tucker, you sure do look comfortable there. I’m getting pretty demanding myself. Mom comes when I call her now. Good trick, huh?

  21. Of course, Tucker! Old dogs are kings, and should expect to be treated as such!

    Monty and Harlow

  22. I’d hide the biskhuits AND bring ‘em to woo!


  23. Tori agrees!

    Stop on by for a visit

  24. Awww… Tucker looks so calm & relaxed.Probably dreaming of younger days

  25. Black Forest Ham? You’re getting meds in Black Forest Ham?! You smart, smart puppy. Yum. Maybe I should rethink coming back as a spoiled house-cat and come back as a hound and find my way to your dada’s house in time for Black Forest Ham fun drugs…it’s a thought.

  26. Hi Tucker – sorry I’ve not been visiting for ages but I wanted to say thank you for this wonderful post. You said it, brother!! ;-) My human says your Dada is an amazing writer. And we think you are a wonderful inspiration to senior doggies everywhere.

    Thank you for popping over to visit me and your nice comment. It’s nice to have a friend to “be old” with together – hee! hee! :P

    Honey the Great Dane

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