forbidden

hello nice reederz its dennis the vizsla dog hay wot is up with this messaj i am getting wen i try to visit my nice frends at blogspot

dada sez googul is beeing paranoyd i dont no wot that meenz all i do no is i cant visit sum of my nice frends rite now so i am verry sad oh well i gess i will hav to amyooz myself in sum other way i think i will go lik myself for a wile its not as much fun as it yoozed to be but it stil helps pass the time ok bye

Character Sheets

As some of you may know, Gary Gygax, the co-creator of Dungeons & Dragons, died last month. It will probably not surprise anyone to learn that I was a big D&D geek back in the day. Anyway, I recently came across some “celebrity character sheets” that had been created as a tribute to Gary Gygax; unfortunately I found them kind of sucky. To rectify this situation, I thought I would create some sheets for the denizens of Dennis’s Diary of Destruction, in honor of the man responsible for my spending so many sunny Saturdays in the basement killing kobolds and whatnot. Gary, these are for you!

It’s A Little Windy

So here in sunny California, something has been happening lately … I think it’s called “weather” and I vaguely remember it from when we lived in New York. For once, we can’t blame the destruction on Dennis. Unless ……..

The Bloggers of the World Medallion

4urpets passed along this nice Bloggers of the World medallion, courtesy of Colin. She and Gina were wishing they could put it in their sidebars, so since I know how to do that, I thought I’d make a little post to help them out. Anyone who already knows HTML will most likely find this post tedious; such people are encouraged to go read about Dennis’s trying to find himself a little friend instead. Or you could buy one of my books and read that.

Nuts A-Poppin

So last night I cooked chestnuts in the toaster oven. Evidently you’re supposed to cut an “X” in them before you roast them, and if you don’t, they eventually start exploding, spraying shrapnel (bits of shell and meat) over a wide area. Who knew? (Besides the instruction label on the container, I mean. But who reads those things?)

How To Hand Out Halloween Candy

So Halloween came and went, and we didn’t get as many trick-or-treaters (hereafter known as TOTs) as I was expecting, given the numbers of kids that seem to be running around the neighborhood on any given day. There is a possibility that our dogs–who bark like lunatics every time someone comes to the door, let alone a group of six or seven someones dressed like axe-wielding maniacs, fairy princesses, and various forms of licensed merchandise–kept some of the TOTs away. I definitely heard some screaming and running off down the driveway when the dogs started up. (Dennis the rescue vizsla didn’t bark all that much, but he was watching the other two and taking notes.)

So anyway, here’s the proper way to hand out Halloween candy. First, buy extra bags. Then, hand out the candy in ascending order of how much you like it; this way you’re left with a bag of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups instead of a bag of Honey Bunches O’ Angry Ants or whatever.

Oh, and give extra candy to the TOTs who say “thank you”. Even goblins can learn to be polite.